Still

We only have a week left in our internship, which is pretty bittersweet. We love what we're doing and don't want to quit, but know we have to in order to finish what we've already begun at school.

Wow.

It's been a long week.

Am I the only one feeling that right now?

Regardless, if you're reading this, you've made it to another Friday. Through another week.

This has been one of the hardest weeks of my life, if I'm being honest. More on that later, though.

For now, it's Friday, and therefore, one of my favorite moments of the week: Five Minute Friday!

If you're new around here and aren't sure what that means, I'd love to let you know. Here's the low-down on FMF. Three simple rules:

1. Using the prompt given, write for 5 minutes flat, unedited, unadulterated.

2. Link back to the original Five Minute Friday post, because, well, why wouldn't you?

3. Encourage the person who linked up before you with a kind-hearted comment.

Simple enough, right? I'd have to agree. And now, for today's prompt...

Still

Ready? Set? Go!

This summer, I've sucked at being still. We're always on the move. Always on the go. Moving from one place to another, completing some task or some other. It's frustrating, really, because I know that what my heart is yearning for right now is stillness.

I love being still. I don't do it well in a literal sense, for I shake on a regular basis because of my medicines and my lung disease. Call me a druggie if you will, but I definitely live with the shakes. However, that doesn't mean that I don't love just sitting, stopping, and simply being.

One of the most powerful things that I've ever done is a Retreat of Silence. We took something like 3-4 hours and spent it alone, silent, and still out in God's beautiful creation. Thankfully, the heat wasn't as blistering that fateful summer three years ago, so it was much easier to be still in the sun and be flooded by God's beauty.

Oh, how my heart yearns for that stillness. I need it. 

And so, though it's not conducive to blog-writing, I'm using the remainder of my 5 minutes to do exactly what my heart longs to do: be still.

...

STOP!

That was refreshing. Even if just for a couple of minutes.

Your turn!

When was the last time you were still? Have you ever been purposefully still? Or is this something you haven't heard of doing before? Give it a try!

I'd love to hear from you about this (or anything else)! Drop in with a comment or shoot me an e-mail! 

If you enjoyed today's post, please feel free to find a way to follow Life Before the Bucket and share it with your friends! 

Full

My grandma had brain surgery last night and the doctor said it went as well as could have possibly been expected. Whew. 

I've made it.

You've made it.

We've all made it...

to Friday!

I don't know what kind of week you've had, but personally, I'm glad the end is here. A little Friday is just what the doctor ordered, along with a side dish of...

Five Minute Friday!

Here's the 4-1-1 on Five Minute Friday (per The Gypsy Mama), in case you're new to it:

The 4: Write for five minutes flat with no editing or critiquing. 

The 1: Link back to The Gypsy Mama, as I just did.

The 1: Hunt down the person who linked up for F.m.F. before you and give them some comment love.

The prompt this week is...

Full.

(eek.)

Ready... Set... Go!


Being full is a pleasure. It's a luxury. It's not something that everybody gets to enjoy.

Most everyone who is able to read this blog has been full physically at one point or another in their lives. I have always had enough food to fill me up and top me off. However, not everyone gets that chance. This really frustrates me, because I know how much food I've wasted in the past and how much I'll waste in the future.

Being full is a pleasure. It's a luxury. It's not something I've gotten to enjoy as of late.

Obviously, I'm not talking about physically at this point.  You see, being full spiritually is even more important than being full physically. It just doesn't make sense to me that so many seek what is physical above what is spiritual. Unfortunately, I've been caught red-handed, guilty as charged, in this matter as well. Because I'm not full. I haven't been in a long time.

Fill me up, Jesus. I know it's what I need.

STOP! 

When was the last time you were spiritually "full?" Do you know what it takes to fill your spirit? In what ways do you fill your spirit on a regular basis?

I'd love to hear from you about this (or anything else)! Just drop me a comment or send me an e-mail!

If you like what you read today, be sure to share it with your friends! And if this is your first time here, don't be shy - find a way to follow along!

Loss

Has anyone noticed the rockin' favicon I added? Because I really like it.

Congratulations. If you're reading this, you've made it to another Friday. Pat yourself on the back, find a good movie to watch (if you didn't lose 10 hours of sleeping watching a certain one last night), and enjoy yourself today.

I'm choosing to enjoy myself by doing a few things: going to the doctor, hanging out with my sister, and blogging! More specifically, participating in...

Five Minute Friday!

If you don't know what Five Minute Friday is, allow me to enlighten you. There are three simple rules to FMF, per The Gypsy Mama.

#1 - Write for 5 minutes flat. No editing, no tweaking. Just write.

#2 - Link back to The Gypsy Mama!

#3 - Go give some comment love to the person who did 5 Minute Friday before you!

Simple enough, eh?

Here goes nothing!

Today's prompt is...

Loss 

Ready... Set... Go!

Alright, I feel like the Gypsy Mama is reading my mind here. I had a post planned out to do with this. I guess I have to take this a different direction (how dare I actually have to think!).

Here's the deal: I lose everything. If I've had it at one point in my life, I've lost it. And chances are, it's still pretty lost. The worst part is, I probably don't even know it!

I'm terrible about losing things and forgetting about them. I'm not sure when it started, either. I'd like to think that I could blame marriage for my forgetfulness, but I've only been married two years, and I've been a professional at losing things much longer than that. So luckily, the wife is off the hook (which is good, because I tend to like her).

I, like many others, wonder where all of these things go that I lose. Maybe the "Lost and Found" at school is actually a collection of my things. I'd check it out, but I've forgotten where it even is (see what I'm saying?). If it is a collection of my things, I should really consider thanking whoever it is that keeps those things for me. That's awful nice of them. Now if I could just get them to give it all back to me...

I wonder how my wife keeps track of me, sometimes. Especially on days when I just have a propensity to lose everything. She must have a super-brain or something. Or maybe it's a girl thing? The world may never know...

STOP!

Yourrrrrr turrrrrrn! And no, my "r" key wasn't stuck. I just was too tired to lift my little finger off of the key. Have a great Friday!

Do you have a tendency to lose things? What do you do about it? Have you found ways to prevent yourself from forgetting about things? I could definitely use your help!

I'd love to hear from you about this (or anything else!). And while you're at it, Share this post with your friends! Thanks for being so epic!

Grateful

So my breathing machine broke and I had to replace it. The thing I'm most disappointed about? It had really cool stickers on it.

It's Thursday... err... I mean... Friday! 

This whole 4 day week thing has thrown me for a loop.

And, as you should know (if you don't, I'll forgive you this once), Friday means something pretty special around here!

It's time for Five Minute Friday!

Here's the 411 (courtesy of The Gypsy Mama), in case you're new to this:

First Rule - Write for 5 minutes flat with no editing, tweaking or self critiquing.

Second Rule - Link back to The Gypsy Mama and invite others to join in.

Third Rule - Go and tell the person who linked up before you what their words meant to you. Every writer longs to feel heard.

Pretty simple, eh? Give it a shot!

This week's prompt?

Grateful

On your mark... Get set... GO!

There's no way on God's green Earth that this is fair. I need 50 minutes to write on this, not just five!

Gratitude is something I've been taught by God since I began a relationship with him. A lot of pretty crappy, sucky stuff has happened over the last few years, and that grateful attitude that he taught me early on really helped push me through (and is continuing to help me to this day).

Something I learned early on was the habit of making lists of things I was thankful for. I've definitely fallen out of that habit (I don't remember the last time I did that), but it's really cool to look back and see how many good things God gives us each and every day.

So today, since I'm only allowed five minutes to talk about how stinking grateful I am, I'm going to make a list!

Here are just a few things I'm grateful for:

You. Without you being here to read all of this gibberish, I wouldn't be able to keep writing. I love writing, but more than anything, I love communicating, and that's a two-way street.

My wife. If it weren't for her, I'd be curled up in the fetal position most days, hiding in a dark corner waiting for someone to find me. Just kidding. But she is pretty awesome.

My fam.

This new medicine that has helped so much.

My new doctor.

My internship.

My education.

My wealth - both worldly and spiritual.

My life. I'm reminded each and every day that I'm alive for a reason. God didn't have to help me fight through these diseases if he didn't want to.

STOP!

Okay, not fair at all. I had a million things running through my head, colliding into each other, causing all kinds of chaos in that five minutes. And I didn't even get to mention one of my favorite things to be thankful for...

COFFEE!

Suffice it to say that this blog wouldn't exist without coffee. 

Anyway... That's my Five Minute Friday for this week! Give it a shot... if you're up to the challenge!

What are you grateful for today? Are there things in your life that you sometimes take for granted that are there every day? What are some of those things? I'd love to hear from you about this (or anything else, for that matter!). Just a comment and/or shoot me an e-mail!

Wonder

I'm sort of famous as of yesterday. Maybe I'll share why soon...

It's Friiiiiiiiiiiday!

I would sing that for you, but then I'd lose a lot of friends.

Friday means a lot to me:

First of all, it means a 3 hour day at my internship. And after getting used to 9 hour shifts, 3 hours feels like just enough time to get there, sit down, and leave.

Secondly, it means that the weekend is here and we get to see our families. Call me a homebody, but I love our fams.

But most importantly, it means I get to participate in... Five Minute Friday!

Here are the rules, via The Gypsy Mama, if you aren't familiar:

Rule I...Write for 5 minutes flat with no editing. None. Scary? Well... tough!

Rule II... Link back to The Gypsy Mama so others can participate!

Rule III... Leave some comment-love for the person who linked up before you on TGM's site!

Today's prompt...

Wonder

Ready... Set... Write!

I wonder about a lot of things in this world.

Why, for instance, we park in driveways and drive in parkways.

I also wonder what it would be like to live on the moon. Would I finally not be the only person who isn't underweight? And would there be such a thing as obesity?  

Really, though, I wonder about one thing in particular: why God hasn't healed me from my sickness.

Now, I'm not talking about some sort of metaphorical, spiritual sickness here. I have that, too, to be sure. In all seriousness, though, I wonder why God hasn't healed me from my lung disease.

Does he not care? Does he not feel my pain? Does he not understand?

Or was Jesus an asthmatic? Maybe he had Kartagener's! Or maybe I'm just kooky for thinking such a thing.

Someone recently asked me a very odd question: "Why do you think God hasn't healed you?" I wanted to answer by saying that I'm not God and I in no way want to speak on his behalf - I'm not nearly that cool. Instead, though, I gave it a little thought and came up with this:

Sure, I wonder why God hasn't healed me. I wonder if he ever will. But frankly, he doesn't need to. I pray that he'll heal me so I can work for him better. But truly, my God is bigger than that. He can use me in spite of me. He is SO big that he can use me with diseased lungs. He doesn't need my lungs to be well for me to serve him. He's that big.

And in light of that, I don't wonder as much anymore. Instead, I'm left in awe of how wondrous He is.

END.

What are some things that you wonder about? Do you find yourself pondering the same things on a daily basis? What sort of conclusions have you reached on those things? I'd love to hear from you about this (or anything else!). Just leave me a comment or send me an e-mail!

Home

Got to make an ER visit for the first time in a few years - it actually wasn't that bad. Until we get the bill, that is.

As you undoubtedly know (because you're awesome), it's Friday.

This means, as you've already predicted (because you're amazing), that I'm doing a Five Minute Friday post.

And thus, I must share with you the three simple rules that accompany this endeavor, via The Gypsy Mama.

Rule 1 - Write for 5 minutes. No more, no less. And no editing, backtracking, or any other sort of nonsense!
Rule 2 - Link back to The Gypsy Mama and invite others to join (that means YOU!).
Rule 3 - Leave some comment love for the 5 minuter who linked up before you!

Today's prompt?

Home

Ready... Set... Go!

The word "home" evokes a lot for me. For instance, I was born in Oceanside, California. However, I've never been there. And my parents (gotta love 'em!) didn't even know the correct city that I could call my "hometown" until I was 13 and we took a look at my birth certificate!

I also have a place that I used to call home for 12 years of my life. It was a small, 3 bedroom house, with 5 of us living in it, and many others occupying space most of the time. It was a tumultuous time in life, but it was fun.

Then we moved up in the world and moved next door. No lie. But it was a huge improvement. The basement was finished, and there were 4 bedrooms, which doesn't sound like a lot more than 3, but it is if you have the basement bedroom, and therefore, the basement, all to yourself. I loved that as a teenager, even if I see how it allowed me to distance myself from my family when I was younger.

Now, at 21, I don't know where to call "home." When we went to the ER two nights ago, they asked where we lived, and I am never quite sure how to answer that question. We are living with one of Kalyn's cousin's (who is awesome for letting us stay here!), but I often list my mom's address for my address in Wichita. Meanwhile, we also have an apartment in Manhattan, so do we call that "home"? Or is it where we are now?

An old adage says "home is where the heart is," which makes me realize something. My home has nothing to do with a street address or house, or how many bedrooms are in my house. It has everything to do with where my heart is, and right now, it's in a million places at once. So for now, this life, this place, and this house... This is my temporary home. 

STOP!

(I have to admit, I went over my 5 minutes. Barely. But only because I wanted to talk to my wife for a moment!) 

Do you know where your "home" is? What does the word "home" evoke for you? I'd love to hear from you about this (or anything else!) in a comment or an e-mail!

Backwards

I'm beyond happy that our Friday workday is only 3 hours.

Whew. It's been a loooong week. Wouldn't you agree? Even around here on Life Before the Bucket, things have been a little unusual. Here's a quick recap:

• We've got a free book giveaway going on until tomorrow morning at 6 AM CST.  Click HERE to enter!

• I introduced everyone to Thing #1, Thing #2, and Thing #3. They're insane little secrets, so if you missed them, check 'em out!

• You guys have been beyond generous with your comments. I LOVE hearing from you, so keep it up!

And now, because it's Friday, and I have a million reasons to celebrate that, it's time for...

Five Minute Friday!

Here are the rules, per The Gypsy Mama:

Rule Uno - Write for 5 minutes flat for pure unedited love of the written word.
Rule Dos - Link back to the Gypsy Mama and invite others to join in. (GO JOIN IN!)
Rule Tres - Get a little crazy with encouragement for the five minuter who linked up before you.

And today's prompt is...

Backwards

Ready... Set... Go!

Well, this prompt is just too coincidental. Just four days after I wrote about all of my insides being backwards (Thing #1), this is what I get to write about again. But, you know, I'm proud of it. I'm proud of sometimes living a backwards life.

You see, I didn't grow up with my dad around much. He lived with us until he was 12, but even that shouldn't really count. So, because he was never around, I missed out on learning a lot of things that my mom didn't quite know how to do. For instance, I have no clue how to hunt.

However, that doesn't mean I haven't made the most of my situation. It may be backwards, but I've taught myself a lot of things that my dad forgot to tell me about. For instance, getting the girl of my dreams. I'd say I did pretty well in that department. Other than that, though, there are a lot of little things that many of us rely on fathers for direction for.

I mean, I taught myself to grill (with a little help from my mom), taught myself how to fish (with a little help from a friend), and taught myself to do some more important things, like stand firm in what I believe in.

Now trust me when I say that it wasn't easy. Though I've survived and turned out just fine, not having a dad was hard. It's still hard. I wonder a lot about what it would be like to have him around today. It was almost three summers ago that I took off to Sierra Leone, arrived back in the US, and found out my father had passed away at the age of 40. Now that was backwards.

STOP!

I'd love to hear your thoughts, comments, and feedback. What was your relationship like with your father? Or are you a dad yourself? How do you want your relationship to be different with your son than it was with your dad? 

Every Day

My post to/for/about Kalyn yesterday was my most popular post ever. I see who the real star around here is...

It's Fridaaaaay!

*cue an insanely annoying song about the penultimate day of the week*

And since today is the glorious day that indicates the end of another work week, I've got another Five Minute Friday for you, brought to you in part by The Gypsy Mama!

Here are the rules:

1. Write for 5 minutes straight without editing your voice.
2. Link back to The Gypsy Mama and invite others to join.
3. Check out the person who did the 5 Minute Friday before you (via TGM's blog) and leave them a comment!

Today's Prompt: "Every Day"

Ready... Set... GO!

Every Day...

Oh, dear. The thought of anything at all being "every day" overwhelms me. Thinking about the life goals that I've set to do every day just reminds me of how imperfect I truly am - how desperate I am to be a part of something bigger than myself.

The thought of every day doesn't mean I'm all "gloom and doom," though. The thought of some things happening every day kind of excites me. For instance...

Being with my wife.

Riding a jetski.

Going bowling.

Drinking coffee.

Chillin' with Jesus.

Every day. These things sound great every day. No matter what, when, who, or how. I mean, unless I break my arm. In which case, bowling and jetskiing are definitely out of the question.

This really gets me thinking, though. What's the difference between the two? Why do I get excited about the prospect of drinking coffee every day, but I dread the idea of exercising for that very same amount of time? Is it just because coffee is more enjoyable than exercise? Or is there something deeper?

When it comes down to the nitty-gritty, what we dread doing every day may be menial tasks that are required to live normal lives (showering, brushing our teeth, ya know...), or they may be huge and require a lot of responsibility.

However, it's those things that really get you going, that really get you excited, that are your passions.

I'm passionate about coffee. About bowling. And jetskiing.

As well as adoption.

And counseling.

And helping others.

Every single day.

STOP!

I'd love to hear from you! Leave me some of your thoughts and find a way to follow Life Before the Bucket!